Useful Definitions 

Battels – Your termly College bill.

Bear Pit – Magdalen’s own sporting grounds, attached to Addison’s Walk.

Bod Card – Your University card and main form of student ID. Necessary to get into College, the JCR and the Waynflete. Also can be used as payment in Hall and the OKB via Upay.

Bop – College parties held in the OKB. Think school discos with more alcohol.

Collections – Exams held at the beginning of each term. Not to be confused with President’s Collections, which is a short meeting you’ll have with the President and your tutors at the end of Michaelmas.

Crew Date – One of the biggest draws of joining a sports team, besides enjoying the actual sport that is. The meeting of two teams at a ‘classy’ establishment for a meal, copious quantities of alcohol and ‘strong chat’ (or attempts at). Sometimes hilarious, sometimes an ordeal and always messy. A good chance to get to know people from other colleges and not limited just to sports teams (often crew dates involve a group of girls from one college going out with a group of boys from another). It’s also totally fine if you’re not keen—these are optional events and are generally organised more or less at the last minute.

Deer park – What we have (two of). Casual.

Fellow – A top academic in College. Some of them (Tutorial Fellows) are responsible for giving you tutorials, marking your essays, setting you collections and marking those too. Apart from that, they are (nominally) running the College. They are the big-wigs of Magdalen and are to be fiercely respected.

Finals – Exams at the end of your undergrad degree and the dreaded time for any student. The library replaces the pub, books replace friends and revision replaces conversation. Not to worry, they’re an awfully long way off yet.

Formal Hall – A formal three course meal in the Dining Hall. Gowns must be worn, and Sundays are optional Black Tie. Fun to take your parents/visitors to and a great way to celebrate special occasions.

Hall – The canteen. Quality is changeable (you are encouraged to give feedback), value for money is pretty good and effort expelled is zero. The draw of a warm meal that doesn’t require you to lift a finger is irresistible.

Hilary – Spring term (January to March). Arm yourself with chocolate digestives and tea, wrap up well and prepare to face darkness at 4:30 pm…

JCR Shop – Magdalen is the only college to have its own shop, providing essay crisis fuel and weekly essentials. All costs are placed on your batells to worry about later. Paid shifts in the shop are taken on by students and items can be suggested to the Quartermasters (Magdalen’s resident shopkeepers) to order.

Late Gate Key – The key that gets you into and out of College after the porters shut the main gate at 11pm. Do not make the mistake of forgetting your key if you plan on essaying in the library into the night. Also allows you entry into nearly every accommodation area in College, the JCR and many, many other places. If you lose it, replacements are expensive and the porters will be very unimpressed, so guard it with your life!

Magdalene College – Our sister college in Cambridge. We have a tendency to beat them at… well, everything. The annual Magd-Magd pseudo Varsity matches are a great place to show your collegiate pride and the post-match crew dates are always a hilariously raucous affair.

Matriculation – A formal ceremony in which you become an official member of the university. You have to get up at an ungodly hour, put on your sub fusc and head over to college for roll call and pictures which inevitably turn out horribly (sub fusc is not flattering on anyone). Then you’re marched off to the Sheldonian Theatre, becoming a tourist attraction on the way, and there you have to queue a lot and get spoken at in Latin. After that it’s back to college for a champagne brunch.

Michaelmas – Winter term (October to December).

OKB – Old Kitchen Bar, an in-college café that’s brilliant for paninis, jacket potatoes and baguettes and has a lovely outside seating area by the river which is a popular spot in the summer months. Nick the barman takes over at night and it becomes a great place to relax with a pint, play some darts and generally kick back. Also where Bops are held.

OUSU – Oxford University Student Union, a student union designed to represent views of students to the university and support Common Rooms in their negotiations with Colleges. Membership is free and automatic by virtue of being a member of an affiliated common room.

OWR – Oscar Wilde Room. Fits around 60 people and has a terrace onto the roof of the OKB. It can be booked out by any student and is frequently used for in-college events and birthday parties, as well as the annual Oscar Wilde dinner organised by the LGBTQ+ reps early on in May.

Oxford Union – A debating society that invites speakers and host events.

Pidge – The post room (your physical mailbox).

Plodge –  Porter’s Lodge, the main entrance into college.

Porters – Your best friends in College. The (tend to) know anything and everything about what is going on in College, so if you have any issues or questions then do seek them out.

Prelims – First year exams.

Punting – A favourite Magdalenite summer pastime. Take lots of Pimms and strawberries, a positive mental attitude and expect to fall in. Worth remembering to get your phone out of your pocket first. Punts are maintained by Punt Reps. The only other acceptable summer pastime is croquet on the New Building lawn.

Scouts – The wonderful people that make your student life so much easier. They’ll clean your room, change your sheets and generally make sure that the accommodation is looking spick and span. Make friends with the Scouts; they know everything that goes on and are most likely going to walk in on you naked.

Stash – Sportswear that proudly displays your team logo. Arguably one of the best perks of joining a sports team.

Tab – A student from ‘the other place’. The rivalry is heated as ever.

Trinity – Summer term (April to July). The best term, despite Prelims.

Tute –  Tutorial.

Varsity – Anything Oxford vs Cambridge related. Normally applied to annual sports matches.

Welfare – A source of comfort, advice, copious quantities of free food in the form of pizza and cake-based goodies and providers of all your health needs.